my never-ending misery.
Friday, September 05, 2008 4:22 PM
frankly speaking, the only thing that can make me moody all the time is,
yes, i bet a couple of you can guess and that's me, not having a car.
my license is turning a year old next month and i still don't have a fucking car.
yes, my bloody father doesn't wanna get me a car and it pissing me off.
seriously, the amount of time it takes for me to get a car from the day i get my license,
i'm not gonna see my dad or look after him next time.
trust me, i will keep to my words.
which means, if i take 2 or 3 years to finally get a car be it i buy myself or whatever,
i'm not gonna see him or look after him for that amount of time.
he's such an idiot i tell you.
always making empty promises that he has never fulfilled since day one.
first, before i got my license, he brought me to suzuki showroom to look at the suzuki swift.
even asked me to choose and see which color i like.
end up, when i fucking pass my driving test and got my license,
he acted dumb and pretended as though everything never happened.
he still can tell me that he wanted to get me a car the other time and now?
still can tell me that i've to pay my own petrol when i get the car.
fucking shit, its nearly a year and i got nothing for goodness sake.
not even the 4 fucking wheels of a car.
then after i got pissed off a few months back,
he promised me he'll give me his car and even said,
"don't worry, this car will be yours eventually."
end up, fucking 3-4 months passed and where's the fucking car?!
i think he's preparing to give me that car when its a fucking antique shit.
or maybe he intends to give me the car when its due to renew the damn coe.
meaning, the fucking shit is 10 years old and its definitely gonna be fucked up.
i seriously don't know what's my bloody idiot father's problem.
he doesn't wanna get me a car and he doesn't allow me to get a bike license?
fuck, if i get a bike license, i don't even have to depend on him to buy a bike please.
oh yeah, and he tried threatening me by saying i can never touch his car if i get a bike.
i laughed and fucked him off by saying, "who cares about your car when i get my bike?!"
then he knew his brain-less plan backfired.
so next, he said if i get a bike, he'll disown me.
nice try dumb ass, i told him to go ahead and feel free to inform me about the details.
anyway, who cares if he's my dad or not.
i'd rather have my cousin's dad as my dad anytime please.
at least my uncle bought my cousin a car immediately after she got her license.
but my fucking father bought me nothing please.
so who cares if he wanna be my father or not.
seriously, even if my idiot father wanna give me his car now, i'm not interested.
come on, i still have to fetch him to work and after his work you know?
unless he gets another car which i can be very fucking sure he wouldn't.
so even if he "gives" me the fucking car, its not like the car is really for my usage.
i just get to drive while he's working and be sure to go fetch him at 6pm.
and also gotto wake up to fetch him to work by 8am.
at the end of the day, it simply means i don't own the fucking car!
i'm like a security guard for the fucking car only.
unlike my friends who's parents bought them a car.
the car is really theirs for fucking goodness sake!
they don't have to fetch their parents to work with the car,
they don't have to rush off halfway to fetch their parents from work,
they can drive the car everyday and at their own time and preference,
they don't have to check their schedule to know if they can drive or not,
they don't have to ask permission to anyone to drive the car,
they don't have to wake up early just to fetch their parents even though its a holiday,
they don't have to do so many fucking things that i do.
fucking shit, its really getting on my nerves.
and i swear, if i really can't control anymore, i'll just go get my bike license.
then when i get my bike, i can just ask my idiot father to FUCK OFF!
at the end of the day, who gives a shit about him being my father or not?
don't give me that shit that its not right to buy your kid a car.
cos so many parents have done so and bought their kids a car.
don't tell me its for my own safety cos if thats the case,
give me money to take cabs cos the fucking public transport sucks!
what's the use of having this kinda father if he doens't keeps to his words?
just simply promise you a car (be it buy you or give you his car),
but end up breaking all his fucking promises?
at the end of the day, if i really get sick and tired of everything,
meaning, sick and tired of asking him to get me a car,
and fed up with hoping he'll give me his car,
i'll just go get my bike license and buy a bike.
and when i do so, nobody can stop me and i mean NO-FUCKING-ANYBODY!
if that idiot father of mine wanna disown me, go ahead.
if he wanna hit me, rest assured, i'll definitely fight back and hit him.
anyway, i don't believe i can't kick his arse for nuts.
if i really blow my top and go crazy, i won't give a shit even if he's my father.
thinking about it, i seriously feel like whacking him now.
fucking kick till i break his rib-cage and then knee his face!
then crush his fingers by stepping on them and grinding it against the ground.
yes, call me an animal or whatever cos i don't give a fucking shit!
people who knows me will know that when i'm real angry and have gone crazy,
i won't care even if you're my father or mother cos i'll still get you!
yes, i'm fucking angry with my idiot father and i really wanna hammer him.
as for my mother, she's another idiot that only knows how to talk.
exactly the same type of people with my idiot father.
they both talk and promise to buy you a car but they never do anything.
the fucking car never come!
fucking empty promises! damn it!!!
i think, when my driving license turns a year old and i still don't have a car,
i'll really go get my bike license and buy a bike.
yeah, that's my decision.
then after that, i'll wash my hands off my family cos anyway,
i don't really care about my family and my house is just a place for me to sleep.
alright, at the end of the day, i fucking want a car for goodness sake!!!!!!
GET ME A CAR, FUCK!!! FUCK! FUCK!!! FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!